Kiran and niran appears exam

Two college student Kiran and Niran were watching movies till night and the didn't study for the test which was to be held in the morning    

in the morning they made a plan and they made themself dirty and weird with grease and oil . the went to the coordinator and said that they had gone to wedding last night and while returning the tyre of their cat brust so they have to puss their car all the way back and they are not in condition to appear in the test

dean gave them time of 2 days that their re exam will be after 2 days. two days passed and they took exam.

they were asked only 2 question
Q.1. what is your name?..................(2 mark)
Q.2. which tyre brust?.....................(98 mark)
a) Front Right
b) Front Left
c) Back Right
d) Back Left....!!

                                    samsung to sam-sing

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In english class teacher was teaching tense
kiran says: sir what will be the present tense of sam-sung?
Teacher: i don't know
Niran says: aare yar that's very simple...... if samsung is the past then samsing will be present

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kiran's expriment

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kiran took a cockroach to have an experiment . first he cut 1 leg of cockroach and say walk. the cockroach walk. then he cut second leg and says to walk again the cocroach walk. the he cut 3rd leg and did the same. at last he cut it's fourth leg and order to walk but cocroach didn't walk. kiran cry so loudly "i found it" " i found it" if we cut cockroach's four legs it becomes deaf 

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return my 30 rupees

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Kiran wins 50 lakh by drinking coke of Rs 30. the dealer gave him 25 lakh after deducting tax and other expenses. Angry kiran: Give me 50 lakh or else return my 30 rupeese back!

                           Niran propose a girl

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Niran proposed a Girl

the girl says i am 1year elder that you 

Niran says: No problem Maiya. i will marry you next year   

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Mr. Kiran and Niran

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A man come to Niran with so hurry and cried
Niran! your son has died
Depressed Niran go to dharara and jump from there
..............
At 7th floor he remember that he have no son
.................
At 5th floor he remember that he is unmarried
..................
At 2nd floor he remember that he is Kiran not Niran

 

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meter made in "NEPAL"

there was a japanese tourist came to Nepal for visiting.on the last day. he hired taxi and told driver to take him airport. while going to airport a Toyota car passed the taxi with speed. the japanese said look toyota very fast! made in japan
again after some time a Honda bike with speed passed the taxi and again the japanese tourist says look Honda very fast! made in japan!





for third time Mitsubishi  passed the car with speed and again the japanese leaned out of the window and yelled, "Mitsubishi, very fast! Made in japan!" the driver get so angry but he kept quite finally they came to airport and the taxi charge was Rs.1000
What?? the japanese exclaimed... so expensive!
The driver yelled back to the meter and said Meter, made in Nepal very very very fast!!!
= = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = ==  = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = = 

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gift

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kiran was shouting in the bhatbhataini super market .......
where is my free gift with this Dhara oil?
shopkeeper: sir there is nothing free with this
kiran: but here is written CHOLESTROL FREE.

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liberary

night in the library
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Kiran:hellow sir at what time the library will open?
Niran: Nine a.m and why did you call me and ask this question at the mid-night
Kiran: Nine a.m in the morning. oh! god
Niran:  yes! nine a.m in the morning."why do you want to get in before nine a.m
Kiran: who said that i wanted to get in? "i want to get out".

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school interview

                       school interview
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kiran was very smart and he solve all the question in the written test so he was called for the interview. later as the interview progressed they found kiran to be bright since he answered all question correctly

the interviewer lastly give him to chose a question :
"i shall either ask you 10 easy question or 1 real difficult problem. think well before you make up your mind"

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teachers brain

 teacher's brain
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a teacher was teaching in philosphy class. there was discussion about the God's existance. the philosophy teacher present following logic: "anyone in the class has touched God?" Nobody spoke. "has anyone in the class heard  God?"again no body spoke."has anyone seen the God?" when no body spoke for the third time. he concluded that "there is no God."among the students one student thought for a second and the ask permission for reply

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letter to bill gates form kiran

             
Dear Mr Bill Gates,

we brought apple computer for our home and first 5 days it goes on smooth but when we connect internate  and planned to open e-mail account and whenever we fill the form in Yahoo in the password column, only "*************"   appears. we found this problem only in the password section. other  section are all wright it shows all what we write in it  we chacked the keyboard but keyboard is all well said Niran

I request you to fix this problem as myself don't know what the password is


                                                                                                                                your's lovely
                                                                                                                                             kiran

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java interview

        interview for java office 
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Interviewer: What are the difference between Threads and process?
kiran : Threads are small ropes. Make a rope from threads is an example for
process.

Interviewer: Tell me about JAR file ?
kiran : File that can be kept inside a jar.


Interviewer: What is JINI?
kiran : JINI is a ghost which was Aladdin’s friend who fullfil the wishes

Interviewer: What is bean ? Where it can be used ?
kiran :  Bean is a kind of vegetable. it is used in kitchen for cooking vegitable

Interviewer: What is the use of Servlets ?
kiran: In hotels, we use to replace servers.

Interviewer: Explain RMI Architecture?
kiran : sorry sir I am a computer professional not an architect student.

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where is the god

                                                 where is the god
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two brothers of age 11 & 13 were so naughty. they always make people come with complain to their parents. parents were so tired of their son's beheviour so they took them to the mental doctor

doctor firstly call 13 years boy and ask him, "where is god?" the boy keep him silence. then the doctor again ask with loud voice, "tell me where is the god?"

the boy suddenly ran away to home and hide himself in the cupboard. when another brother saw this he also ran away after him and reached to home and asked to his brother why you ran from the doctor

the elder brother said "god is missing and every body is thinking that we did it"

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Bhagwan ko naam ma pathauna!!!

Bhikhari : Hellow Everest Hotel, 1 Pizza, 2 sandwitches,  1 Biryani pathai deu ta
Everest hotel staff : kasko naam ma pathai dinu sir?
Bhikhari: Bhagwan ko naam ma pathauna!!!

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kiran's answer

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kiran was coping the answer of niran and the answer to the problem was "log(1+x)" so kiran didn't want to make it obvious like that because teacher will think that he had cheated so he changed the answer like  "timber(1+x)"

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funny lady

lady: hmm sari ta ramro 6 tara yesko colour chai ramro chaina
salesman: mam don't worry. aak choti dhuda sab colour jancha    

                                                               logne swasni
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 logne swasni chupchap naboli kana yatra gardai theyo aani te dubai aak aarka sanga bolna tayar theyena. tetaikai bela gadha ra khhachar ko hul sammune aay. aani logne le tyo timro nate dar ho hai bhanyo. swasni le ni ho ta ni " maile tini haru ko family ma bihe gare pachi bhayena ta tini haru mera nate dar"

                                                   
                                                  manabta maathi ko vishwas nai uthera gayo!!"
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aauta chor aakdin chori garna aakdam dhani ghar ma dhuke 6. aani teha tesle aauta trunk ma tala lagako jasma dherai paisa theyo tyo kholna tala torna lagyo tara teha. yo tala torna pardaina 102 ma call gara aani red button dabau tala aaphai khulcha bheni lekhako theyo. aani jaba usle teso garyo teha ta thulo alarm bajyo aani polish aayera teslai pakrera lagyo
jada jadai chorle bhanyo:" aaja mero manabta maathi ko vishwas nai uthera gayo!!"

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funny passenger

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khale: why did you take an extra ticket?
passenger: if i lose one ticket, then other will save me
khale: what would you do if you lose that both tickets
passenger: do i look like a fool. i have my buss pass


                                  Hot News
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kiran: tyo newspaper lai kina fridge ma rakhako?
niran : kina ki tyo full of HOT NEWS cha ni

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exam!!!!

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Kiran and Niran ware fighting outside the examination hall. Teacher came out and said
teache: why you both are fighting

student(niran): sir, he left his answer sheet blank                                  
teacher: then why should that bother you?
student(niran) : i too left my answer sheet blank
teacher ; soooaaacccccc!!!!!!!!!!!!
student(niran); sir incase you will think that we have copied from each other



     

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Kiran&Niran jokes

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kiran : if x=y and y=z then x=z, now give me the practical example of this equation in the real life
Niran :i love you sir and you love your daughter that means i love your daughter

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